In Conservative (Postmodern!) Singapore: 1981--2008In 1981, at the age of 28, as a handsome, intelligent and happy man, I started to have penetrative sexual intercourse with women for the first time in my life! And I also decided to devote myself wholeheartedly to a freelance writing career--contributing, regularly and unflinchingly, thoughtful but interesting articles to various magazines published in Singapore.
The year before, in 1980, when I was 27, I had resigned from my untenable position as a Personnel Officer in Singapore Food Industries, where I worked miserably for 4 years. Prior to that unsatisfactory position in that government-controlled company, I had been working unhappily as a Clerical Officer in the Ministry of Defence for about 10 months (between Dec. 1975 and Oct. 1976). I had spent the entire year before, in 1975, at the age of 22 --after having served two-and-a-half years in the SAF as a National Serviceman and becoming a reservist in June 1974--trying to find out what I should do to survive as an aspiring writer.
In 1981, 6 years later, at the age of 28, I had my first (as mentioned earlier) and most enjoyable penetrative sexual intercourse -- with a PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE and INTELLIGENT woman called Kelly. Kelly was a stunningly beautiful commuter whom I first met on a bus plying along Orchard Road one morning.
That year (1981), the cinemas in Singapore were screening "Reds", "The Postman Always Rings Twice" and "Chariots of Fire". It was also the year when the late opposition leader J. B. Jeyaretnam won his first political victory over the PAP at the Anson By-Election.
I was residing happily at Whampoa Drive then--spending my free time reading books and magazines and listening to rock music. (John Lennon had died the previous year.) I was beginning to engage myself in the naive, simple and unsophisticated enjoyment of a life based on music, magazines, books and penetrative sexual intercourse (with prostitutes, no less!). I also started to spend, that year, much of my free time composing, first, anti-government, and then later, pro-government, letters to The Straits Times--which published, over the next few years, more than 20 pro-government letters of mine--including that PAP-fawning and, especially, pro-LKY letter, "On voters and leaders", in the year 1984 (another General Elections year).
I was having very satisfying sexual relations with many captivating and different women in 1984, an unpredictably disappointing General Elections year for the PAP, when it had a shock over the discouraging polling results.
It was also the year when "The Killing Fields" and "Amadeus" were being screened in the cinemas.
In December the next year (1985), I moved into a one-room HDB rental flat at Jalan Kukoh. Sometime in the middle of 1986, at the age of 33, I befriended a sexy but married woman called Canty, 35, while I was having dinner alone at a Food Court in the old Forum Galleria in Orchard Road. Canty approached me eagerly, and after seeing her for a few days, she soon became my lover. Oh, she was shameless and uninhibited--that amazing woman! I had the best three months of my sexual life with her.
That year, the local cinemas were screening "Top Gun", "9 1/2 Weeks", and "Aliens".
Turning 34 the next year (1987), I moved into a small rented room in an old private apartment at Telok Kurau. It was the year when the Singapore government detained a group of alleged "Marxist Conspirators". Typical PAP politics!
The cinemas were screening "Fatal Attraction", "Wall Street", "The Last Emperor" and "The Untouchables".
1987 was also the year when I began to visit, over the next few years (until 1989), Indonesia, Thailand and Malaysia--several times.
In 1990, at age 37, I moved into a 5-room HDB flat in Yishun. I got to know a pretty but married 26-year-old woman called Khin Khin, who was working at Philips Singapore Pte Ltd at that time.
That year, I remember, the cinemas were screening "Dances With Wolves" and "Home Alone".
And I spent the next 4 years (until 1994) with the English-educated but temperamental Khin Khin as my regular weekend lover, making passionate love with her every time.
I eventually ended my intense affair with Khin Khin in 1994, at age 41, but not before taking her (a rock music fan) on an outing, for the last time--significantly, to a Bob Dylan concert held at the Indoor Stadium in Kallang in February of that year.
I moved into a large private residence at Chempaka Avenue in December 1994 and spent one fruitful year frequenting the brothels in Geylang--during my spare time. There, I met Jenny, Linda, Hantu and a host of other attractive and inviting ladies--who all served me very well!
I was working on a 17-page-long essay called "Notes From The Underground" from that year (1994) onwards--using the personal computer which I had just bought.
In 1995, I moved into a 4-room HDB flat at Hougang and continued to use my personal computer for my freelance writing. Over the next few years, I continuously revised this long confessional essay and sent many different versions and copies of it--while it was still a work-in-progress--to many different people in Singapore. Finally, in 1997, at age 44, I completed the definite version of my essay with much satisfaction. I sent this last completed version to a local cultural magazine for publication. But it was rejected--to my great disappointment. Fuck the Cultured Bastard!
That year, the cinemas were screening "Con Air" and "The Fifth Element".
By late December of that year (1997), I had already moved into a 3-room HDB flat in Yishun. I then visited Taiwan and befriended a young and pretty tour guide named Ann. We spent one week in Taiwan together--visiting places of interest, eating at restaurants, and then spending intimate nights together in hotel rooms, making sweet love. It was a most enjoyable trip for me.
Beginning from 1998, when I turned 45, I became a full-time serious writer--spending my days at my new 3-room Yishun flat or at the public libraries, composing essay after essay--with the intention of publishing them as a collection of essays in book-form.
For the next 10 years (till 2008), I worked diligently at my self-chosen vocation--reading widely and deeply and writing skillfully and carefully. My father passed away in 2000 and my mother two years later, in 2002 (when I was 49).
Habitually, I had two wonderfully devoted female companions during these 10 long years, when I was working as a serious full-time writer (of essays) and as an aspiring author (of controversial books). I met sweet and enthusiastic Jennifer, who was 26 then, at a bank near Aljunied MRT Station. And I befriended charming and pretty Yan, who was 25 then, at Pudu Raya Station in Kuala Lumpur one morning while I was on holiday. Jennifer and Yan were both attractive, cheerful and generous in spirit. I had many very interesting conversations with these two fine ladies, and I managed to persuade them to have sexual relations with me eventually--after they had trustingly and honestly accepted and understood that I needed more than just light physical contact with them during our encounters or meetings.
I became a still-active senior citizen, at 55, in 2008. It was a most eventful and significant year for me--as a full-time writer and as a still-horny man. I had not lost my sexual desires or appetites for women--even after reaching 55. What a personal feat--for a liberated, liberal and libertarian intellectual-writer like me!
But now, I sometimes had to pay for the services of prostitutes--for the satisfaction of my sexual needs, as I was no longer youthful or handsome enough to attract ordinary respectable women as my sexual partners.
I was therefore extremely lucky to have met my new-found girlfriend and lover, Yi Xuan, an attractive and sexy 22-year-old Chinese woman whom I picked up from a coffeeshop at Geylang near noon on Sunday, 19.10.08, and with whom I spent a terrific 1-hour love session in bed at a hotel located in the vicinity. Yi Xuan was responsive, interested, amiable, companionable, considerate, sociable, friendly, genial, helpful, kind, obliging and solicitous. What an amazing woman--one with heightened feminity! I would like to fuck this pretty woman again and again! It was an electrifying and realistic sexual intercourse--totally unlike those deceptive, illusionary and imaginary occasions with the seven masturbating pussies from the Network (the Company, the System, the Party), whose long-distant, faraway, remote-controlled and manipulative performances (as sex service workers) are anything but fortifying to such a humane soul, mind, heart and body like me--yes, to a man, human being, citizen and amorous Modernist writer in this postmodern world. Hello, Brave New World! Ha, ha, ha!
I am a well-read oppositionist intellectual, an honest partisan reviewer, a cultivated American scholar, a responsible published blogger, a versatile political commentator, a liberated weekly newsmaker! I like to read, write, think and fuck pretty women--and also exert my personal impact on my readers. However, I've been not much of a success so far as a reader, writer, thinker and fucker. Why? Because I've been too meek, acquiescent, compliant, deferential, docile, forbearing, gentle, humble, long-suffering, mild, modest, patient, peaceful, resigned, slavish, soft, spineless, spiritless, subdued, submissive, tame, timid, unambitious, unassuming, unpretentious, unresisting, weak and yielding! Yes, I should have been more arrogant and rebellious. Indeed, hopefully, I WILL BE--from now onwards!
Meanwhile, I had not visited the local cinemas for a very long time now.
I had also, for the first time, bought my first handphone in 2008--and used it frequently to contact my publishers, both in Singapore and Malaysia. I had, too, bought a new personal computer--for about S$1,000/- in August and even started to become a regular blogger.
But my first love will always be writing--and, yes, women (especially pretty ones)! I tried, quite successfully, to befriend as many pretty women as possible--and even managed to have sexual relations with many of these young and attractive women in hotel rooms--and also at my home in Yishun--while patronizing prostitutes at the same time. Many of these women--prostitutes or otherwise--were remarkably beautiful, youthful and friendly.The year 2008 was indeed exceptional for me as a man.
Finally, as a serious full-time writer, I had managed to write, in the year 2008, at the highest artistic and intellectual level--like a self-assured contributor to the great Partisan Review or The American Scholar (two American journals of the highest quality). It was no mean achievement on my part. The problem was, I was still having trouble trying to get these critical essays published in book-form--as a collection of essays--by local publishers. I may be getting poorer and poorer in my finances; but I am becoming richer and richer in my mind! I have striven to become a more powerful writer. And, yes, I have succeeded in becoming more potent in fucking women. Indeed, I am in major (if not total) control of my life. I am in ascendancy! (Yes! Yes! Yes!)
And, yes, individuality--not subjectivity--has sustained me in this messy but exciting postmodern world. Hello again, Brave New World!
Posts
