My Recent Times And Experiences With Various Asian Beauties -- As An Oppositionist and Critic of the Surveillance Authorities

My Overdue "Sexual" Contacts

(Countless!), Social Relations

(Countless!) and Penetrative Sexual

Intercourse Sessions --

With Good (!) Women and Girls

( From 28th June 2008

To 29th October 2008) :

1. 28.6.08 (Sat.) -- With "Fei Fei" (young, cheerful & lovely); satisfaction: 100% !;
2. 20.7.08 (Sun.) -- With "Yeh" (attractive); satisfaction: 80% !;
3. 30.7.08 (Wed.) -- With "Fung Fung" (mischievous but loving); satisfaction: 50% !;
4. 13.9.08 (Sat.) -- With "Yan" (25, cheerful, pretty, Indonesian); satisfaction: 90% !;
5. 19.9.08 (Fri.) -- With "Huey Bin" (young, cheerful & beautiful); satisfaction: 90% !;
6. 20.9.08 (Sat.) -- With "Jenny" (mercenary but totally obliging); satisfaction: 70% !;
7. 21.9.08 (Sun.) -- With "Xiao Fung" (simply, adorably lovely); satisfaction: 100% !!!;
8. 27.9.08 (Sat.) -- With "Xiao Chang" (loving & lovely); satisfaction: 100% !;
9. 29.9.08 (Mon.) -- With "Linda" (pretty); 90% !;
10. 1.10.08 (Wed.) -- With "Hantu" (pretty, sexy and, yes!, money-minded!); satisfaction: 55% !;
11. 19.10.08 (Sun.) -- With "Xuan Xuan" (22, attractive, charming, loving, irrepressible, responsive, interested, sexy, amiable, companionable, considerate, sociable, friendly, genial,helpful, kind, obliging and solicitous; terrific!); satisfaction: 100% !;
12. 22.10.08 (Wed.) -- With "Xuan Xuan" (again! -- still charming, loving, irrepressible and passionate; lots of foreplay; wonderful!); satisfaction: 100% !;
13. 29.10.08 (Wed.) -- With "Xuan Xuan" (yes, once again! -- my darling lover, new-found girlfriend, honey and babe! I love her with all my heart, soul, mind and body! My major success in my love, sex and social life after 36 years of being under governmental surveillance and manipulation! Rock on, Sweetie!); satisfaction: 160% !!!!!!!

COMMENTARY:

The PAP bastards think I can't stop THEM from undermining and spoiling my love, sex and social life -- probably due to the fact that I can't see them in person! But really, I don't give them a fucking recognition or acknowledgement!

So I don't bother about these surveillance officers. I know the PAP's TOP SECRET! Openly and publicly! It is: Domination Over Its Subjects! I just do what I please! All it takes is for someone I trust to enhance my life -- sexually and hence intellectually. Yes, this is how I live my life on my own terms and conditions -- as a reluctant "implantee", an "agent", a critic, a writer, a "schizophrenic", a "pervert", a lover, a "molester", a "prisoner", a blogger and a socio-political commentator and essayist. And I just need the perfect accompaniment -- a nice, pretty girl whom I love with all my heart, soul, mind, and body -- for such a multi-various life. And do you know who that lucky girl might be? Well, she is my latest girlfriend and lover, Kelly. I, an individualist, feel lucky to have met Kelly. Say good luck to me -- for I am under surveillance by the authorities and my rights as a man, writer, citizen and human being are being infringed upon and cruelly violated by these ubiquitous authorities. I, too, am an ordinary human being after all: I need conveniences, accessibilities, accommodation, advantages, amenities, appliances, appropriateness, availability, benefits, chances, comfort, ease, enjoyment, facilities, fitness, handiness, help, leisure, opportuneness, opportunities, satisfaction, services, serviceability, suitability, timeliness, uses, usefulness and utilities!

Nowadays, I'm in greater control of my life and personal being and my career as a writer is in ascendancy! (Yes! Yes!)

I'm loving, responsible, liberated, natural, versatile, provocative, sensual, quiet, commanding, attentive, modern, notable, intriguing, ingenious, captivating, deep, mysterious, daring, confident, friendly (except to the MSD/PAP officers), honest, wild (sometimes!), resourceful, cultivated, well-read, high-brow (most of the time), low-brow (sometimes), handsome (still!), individualistic, sexy, manly, notorious, sincere, bold, assertive, independent, sharp-minded, intelligent, thoughtful, intuitive, forceful, self-educated (mostly) and, yes, FREE (determinedly, insistently, persistently and potently!). I am the star in my own blogs -- for I write not as a team of group-thinking composite bloggers but only (and only) as myself, an independent authorial voice (of reason and compassion).

I'm getting poorer and poorer in my finances; but I'm becoming richer and richer in my mind. I'm more powerful now as a writer, citizen-leader and critic. The PAP bastards can torture me in any way they want. But as long as I am alive, I will always be an oppositionist (in this post-modernist, globalized world), a writer and critic who loves women and girls (especially when they are pretty and shapely)!

If there is only one idea of freedom, and only one, then the PAP will win! But the PAP has not won, not yet! If it has, then it would not repeat this word "freedom" over and over, again and again! It wants to, with such repetition, change not only people's minds but also their very BRAINS!

If the PAP has succeeded in getting its own version or idea of "freedom" into the BRAIN of every Singapore citizen, then it could simply have taken freedom -- as it has defined it -- for granted! Did it? Does the PAP still? Even today?

QUOTES FOR THE TIMES:

Deprivation and impotence sanctify the "mindless", the most humble!

-- George Steiner, ERRATA: AN EXAMINED LIFE (London: Weidenfeld & Nicolson, 1997)

Untold personal destitution, ridicule, isolation, obscurity, not to speak of persecution on ideological-political grounds, has attended on the production of great art, literature or philosophic investigation....the evidences of suffering and solitude remain overwhelming. In the midst of the inhumanity and indifference of history; a handful of men and women have been creatively possessed by the compelling splendour of the "useless"! This constitutes the eminent dignity, the "princeliness" of our "brutal" kind.

-- George Steiner, ibid

None are more enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free.

-- Goethe

But who will guard the guardians themselves?

-- Juvenal (c. 60 -- 130 AD)

The true danger is when liberty is nibbled away, for expedience, and by parts.

-- Edmund Burke (1729 -- 1797)

Money, Money, Money!

The Fate of a Horny But

Ageing Writer-Intellectual


I Will Succeed With

Khin

Khin!



In a world where everything seems programmed, even chaos, chance, love, sex and surprise, I've got to defy logic and bewilder people -- as an individualist!

Sharing, individualistic, creative, expressive!

Hugging, kissing, caressing!

Lively and interesting conversation with such a nice woman--again!

I'm an ageing writer, attempting to touch a young woman's mind, heart and body!

I'm sexually experienced, thick-skinned, politically aware, lonely, single, liberated, articulate, intelligent, handsome, trusting, friendly, observant, kind, gentle, honest, free-thinking, successful and wholeheartedly in love with Khin!

The PAP Project versus the Reality of the situation.

The memory of an individualist -- of his true self: In another "story" or two! [See "Remembrance of Most things Past: 1953-1972" and "Memories (and Records) of My Childhood, Boyhood and Young Adulthood at Tasek Utara Estate" (http://www.trainofmypresence.blogspot.com).]

Can I trust the PAP Government? (It is difficult for me to do so--with such a collection of controllers and their diverse opinions, needs, aspirations and experiences!)

But the PAP has only one aim--to make me join it as a member of the PAP Government!

I'm a critic and writer who can't imagine myself as a member of the PAP Government!

I'll never trust the PAP Government!

Accommodation? Trade-offs? Costs?

The undisciplined use of meaning, construction, symbol, interpretation, and metaphor without any regard for the constraints of knowledge about human behaviour from other sources!

Anarchism! Miseducation! Common Good! Determining Democracy! Failed States. Fateful Triangle! For Reasons of State! Hegemony or Survival! Interventions! Language and Politics! Language and Mind! Language and Thought! Middle Illusions! Media Control! Objectivity and Liberal Scholars! Perilous Power!

Your Full Name, please? Identity? Date of Birth? Educational Level? Occupation? (Yes!)

Ah, the periodic cost of living a stable, boring life (which I have borne all this while)! No to Social Security! No to intensified State Control! I'll not belong to the Party! I'm unwilling to support its politics! (Otherwise, or else, I must be prepared -- or accept being led -- to become a SUBJECT!)

This blog is officially protected! What was required by the officials? (What I myself can morally justify!)

I'm trying to deal with historical truth!

My "blasphemies" against right-wing intellectuals and politicians?

What is your preferred genre--as a symbol and representation of reality?

Are the tyrants and the suppressed masses truly irreconcilable in every respect? (Or is it a matter of unconscious reciprocal stimulation? A central question, one that is valid with respect to artists and authors: What are the conflicts, contradictions, and frustrations of freedom?)

What is the most sensitive aspect of my self-understanding? (My creativity! Or my feeling of forced deracination and intensified risk and insecurity?)

Oh, the clarifying and cathartic functions of writing, again, in my latest blog entries! At its most effective level!

(And I'm eagerly waiting for Khin to appear in my presence, again!--for conversation and ...).